The number one search entry that has brought people to my site last month is “teaching children how to tithe,” so I’ll take that as a request to speak more on that topic!
Teaching children to tithe is an important part of their faith education that I think we overlook sometimes. Giving to God is a core value of our faith that needs to be taught early and reinforced often.
The Problems with the Popular Way
The most common way that I see tithing taught to children is simply by grownups giving children a quarter to put in the offering plate. I think that this is ok for young children (~ ages 2-4), because it gives them an opportunity to participate, but this may not send the right message to elementary school children. Here are some of the reasons why simply giving offering money to children falls short:
- The money wasn’t theirs to begin with, so they do not feel the satisfaction of it being a personal gift to God. Giving is a way to express our love for God.
- They put in all the money they were given, so there is no sense of teaching children to give a portion of what they receive. If we are truly teaching children to tithe, when a grownup gives a child a dollar to put in the plate, the child would say, “thank you,” and then put the dollar in his or her pocket and pull out a dime for the offering!
- This does not teach the idea of putting God first in our finances. We want to teach children to be intentional about their giving rather than to give from whatever they have in their pockets on Sunday. In other words, we want to teach children (and adults) to give to God first, rather than to give God our leftovers.
A Suggested Approach
Instead of this popular way, I would like to suggest a different approach that we are using with our now six year old. We use money jars. We have three jars sitting on my son’s dresser that are labeled “Money for God,” “Money to Save,” and “Money to Spend.” This way, we will be able to teach him to be intentional about how he uses his money. He gets two dollars per week. We give it to him as a dollar bill and 4 quarters, that way one quarter can be given to the God jar, one to the savings jar, and the rest in the spend jar. On Sunday, he takes the quarter from God’s jar, and takes it to church. He has seen Cindy fill out the offering envelopes at church, and he does it, too. It makes him feel so good that look on his face is a testimony to tithing in and of itself.
Here are some of the things that we discussed with him as we implemented the jar system:
- God made everything, so everything is God’s. Even us. We are God’s creation. We are thankful that God created everything. God has given us so much that we want to give back to God, too.
- We want to think about God first. So, the first jar we put money in will be the “Money for God” jar.
- We give to God because we love God. We also show God our love by going to church, talking to Him in prayer, and by doing good things for others. In fact, when we give money to the church, it helps the church afford to do the things that God has asked the church to do. It helps the church teach people about God so that other people can know that God loves them, too.
Things Not to Teach a Young Child about Tithing
Tithing is a complex issue that we must learn about in stages, simply because it includes some developmental ideas that children might not be ready to understand.
- We have not talked with our son about giving 10%. He is in kindergarten. He is nowhere near learning about figuring percentages! There is no need to teach him percentage tithing if he is not ready for it. Besides, the jar method teaches him to feel good about giving to God rather than feel that it is connected to a legalistic “we give because we have to” mentality. Teaching to give some is enough for now.
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We did not talk about prosperity. One blog that I read suggested teaching early elementary children about the blessings they would receive for tithing, saying, “The blessings can be as simple as an increased spirituality in your home, health for family members or extra money when you need it.” While I believe that God blesses the gift and the giver, this promise of prosperity is bad theology, especially to a five or six year old. For an early elementary school child, and most grownups, even, it is enough to teach that we give to God because we love God. It is better to leave the concept of receiving blessings from tithing for later, or it could send a wrong message.
- It teaches that we can pay God off. Want to heal your sick mother? Give a few more dollars in the plate.
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It will cause a crisis of faith in times of crisis. When something bad happens, it will cause the child to think
- That God did not hold up God’s end of the bargain, or
- That the child should feel guilty because he or she did not give God enough money.
- That God did not hold up God’s end of the bargain, or
- It teaches that we can pay God off. Want to heal your sick mother? Give a few more dollars in the plate.
In conclusion, we chose the jar method because it seemed to teach what we think is important for a child to know about giving to God. We give because we love God and we want to put God first in all we do, including how we use our money.
Do you have any tips or success stories for teaching children about tithing? Did I forget to mention anything important?
Welcome to Church and tea! My name is Dan. I’ve been married to Cindy for 9 years. We have two boys, 7 and 3 years old. I am a Florida native and earned a Bachelor of Arts degree in Religious Studies from the University of Florida and a Master of Divinity degree from the Candler School of Theology at Emory University. This site is called churchandtea simply because I am a United Methodist Pastor and I love sweet tea. I often find myself trying to solve the world’s problems over a glass of sweet tea. Feel free to pour yourself a glass and join in the discussion!
Why not teach them the truth?
NT giving principles are far better: FREEWILL, SACRIFICIAL, GENEROUS, JOYFUL, NOT BY COMMANDMENT OR PERCENTAGE AND MOTIVATED BY LOVE FOR GOD AND LOST SOULS.
http://www.tithing-russkelly.com
Thanks for the comment. I am not sure exactly what you mean, though. Are you agreeing or disagreeing with my article?
I think we are on the same page, though, as far as not being overly legalistic about tithing, and stressing love for God and each other. Words like the ones you capitalized, though, will mean nothing developmentally to a five or six year old, so I think it is important to present tithing in a way children will understand. That’s where this Jar method comes into play.
Update: Looking at your website, I feel like I need to comment further. I appreciate your interpretation and research in this matter. You do make some good theological points. In this post, I use the word tithe in its modern sense rather than the strict legal sense of the Old Testament. In modern times, the tithe has come to mean the overall spirit of giving to the church as exemplified throughout the Bible and our Christian tradition. Our tradition, for example, has maintained that 10% is a good guideline for giving. With modern innovations (and I use modern loosely here), it has become unrealistic to measure giving with livestock, thus we have had to reinterpret giving over time. With this in mind, you are being overly tough on people who are trying to be faithful to a tithing spirit in these modern times.
Also, I offer some feedback on your presentation. I suggest that you refrain from calling people with differing definitions or interpretations liars. That does not fit with good practices of open dialogue or debate. Your presentation gets in the way of your message. Where I might suggest your site for some interesting and/or alternative theological research on tithing, I would not simply because I would not feel comfortable referring someone to that kind of presentation.
Hmmm… your comments got interesting. Obviously, I agree with you on the points that you have made. There really is something to giving from what is yours and not expecting something in return. Ten percent is a nice guide, but D3 is actually tithing about 12.5%- it’s easier to divide up his allowance that way. So, we’re really not teaching a %, just to make God #1 in all areas of your life- including money.
Teaching children to tithe is an important part of their faith education.The earlier you give your child a faith education, the better it will be.Following commendeents is also very important. child teaching should take place with special care.
The tithe was to go to the levites who were of the bloodline of Aaron. Is that who you are teaching children to tithe to…? If not, then you are teaching your children an unscriptural tithing message.
The tithe was to be of food in kind. Are you teaching your children to tithe of the produce of their crops…? If not, then you are teaching your children an unscriptural tithing message.
If you are teaching your children to tithe 10% of their income then you are ripping your children off and you are teaching your children an unscriptural tithing message.
Money has nothing whatsoever to do with tithing and you are doing your children a gross injustice by teaching them that it has. Not only that but you are teaching your children to give to thieves and false prophets.
Anybody who has studied the Lords Tithe knows that the modern day system of tithing was established to line the pockets of those who claim to be Christ (Annointed).
I don’t mean to be rude Dan, but really… Christians need to study the Lords Tithe rather than just believe everything that those who benefit from the Tithe teach them.
Here is some very eye opening information about The Lords Tithe. I do not post this here to be obnoxious… I post it here that it may be of benefit to you and your children.
YHVH bless you, and keep you;
YHVH make His face shine on you,
And be gracious to you;
YHVH lift up His countenance on you,
And give you peace
For those who like a short comment:
Basically, it seems to me that the Online Church view of tithing is a series of rationalizations that pick and choose scripture so that it that gets in the way of giving from the heart. If modern Christian giving were based on OT law, then they would have a point, but we give out of love rather than giving because we are commanded to do so.
I hope that this post helps parents who want to share the positive experience of giving with their children.
For those who like longer, more thought out comments:
Online Church, Here are some areas that we disagree:
1. I do not tithe because it is a law. I do not see the tithe as an act of following the law, but an act of love for God and God’s church. I tithe not because I am commanded to do so by the law. I tithe because I love God, and want to give to support God’s ministry through the Christian church.
2. Our approach to Biblical study seems to differ. It is important to study the Bible verse by verse, but doing only that will cause you to miss the forest for the trees. I believe that we must also observe overarching themes of scripture, and if we do, we see that giving to God’s church is definitely one of those overarching themes that we are called to observe.
3. I approach tithing with cautious optimism. Sure, the church has abused tithing in history, and abuse is going on today as well. I would not advocate giving moneys to a church unless they have a system of checks and balances that is open for all to see. Transparency is important. Part of these checks and balances needs to include a plan for using the money that is prayerfully considered by the church members to ensure that the money is used in such a way as the church is being called to use it.
4. I do not take the word tithe in the strict, literal, OT sense. I believe that God calls us to give of our time, our gifts, our presence, and our money (and our whole selves, for that matter). Tithing, in the way that I am using it here, refers to our monetary giving. I believe that we are called to give to God’s church to further Christian ministry in the world. I believe that 10% is a good guide and goal for that giving. Why? Partly because of the Old Testament understanding of giving, but also because 10% is part of our Christian tradition. I enjoy giving to God in this way.
Loved this idea!!!! Matt and I have on numerous occasions wondered how to help Dani and John learn the concept of tithing and this is VERY doable. Do you give Daniel $2 week with responsiblities??? We have discussed allowances and never made up our mind regarding it.
Thanks, Debra. We want to teach Daniel about earning money, but at this point, we wanted to focus more on earning an allowance for being a responsible household citizen. He has a morning and evening checklist that have normal tasks like ‘tidy up the bathroom’ and ‘clean your room’. There are also behavioral tasks on the check list like ‘no whining’, and ‘be a responsible big brother’. On one hand, he knows that he is expected to follow his chart regardless of whether or not he gets an allowance. On the other hand, he knows that his allowance is tied to how well he contributes around the house.
Thank you for this article. Yours was the first that came up in my google search. I appreciate the clear and kind way that you express yourself even when disagreeing with others.
Thanks for the kind words! I haven’t posted on here in a little while. I am working on a new site with my church, and I think I will move these posts over there. I’ll make sure to post more when I know more.